Sliding down to climb back up.

I am constantly reminded that my illness has a mind of its own. I have been a bit up and down the last few weeks, trying to stay motivated and keeping things running but sometimes it’s just so hard.

It’s hard not to let my mood effect the people around me, it’s hard to not want to be around the people you love. You know that you are hurting their feelings by reacting the way you are but you can’t stop that voice in your head saying all these nasty things, you just have to not repeat them.

The negativity surrounds you like a cloud and no matter how hard you try to blow it away it seems to just grow bigger. So to get out of my own head I need to make others smile, I need to concentrate on making someone else happy and then maybe it will lift my cloud.

I will be cleansing my crystals, watering my flowers, meditating and doing anything my family ask for to give me some direction, some plan and reason to this blurry mess right now. Blessed be šŸ’œ