Knowing and doing are two very different things. Take now for instance, I know I should be doing something, anything really to help shake the cloud I have felt over me the last few weeks but instead I am wallowing, why? I don’t know.
I should be meditating or doing some yoga to release the tension I have building yet I’m sat at my computer telling you all what I should be doing, all with the perfect excuse not too.
some days it is easier to make my self follow the right patterns, knowing what needs to be done and doing it and then there are days like today where i just want to sleep, to hide and not feel anything. These are the days I need to force myself but I don’t have the energy, the willpower or to be completely honest the want to do it.
I tell myself I am allowed bad days and I am, the adjusting to full time work again and needing to re-evaluate everything is a big deal, I have set some large goals I want to achieve this year but cant do that sat on my backside worried about things I’m capable of fixing. I shouldn’t be so hard on myself but I cant help it one small slip can feel like the slide back down to the dark.
So today I look for tomorrow, I look for a purpose to keep me moving and grateful for all that I have, I look for energy and guidance and hope that giving myself today is what is needed. Blessed be.